Show jokes
I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application. I asked him to show me his skills and experience, but he just started diving and asking for pens and tap-ins. I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.
A man is being sued for raping a deaf girl. The judge, showing his pinky:
"You should be ashamed, man, your conscience is even smaller than that!"
The girl, showing her arm:
"Mhhhmmhmm, mhhmhm!"
What are emos' favorite TV show theme song?
Beyblade, Beyblade, let it rip!
Me: You have terrible jokes.
Mum: Shows me a mirror.
Sam's mum is so fat, when she fell down the stairs, I thought EastEnders finished!
Memes
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
Have you heard of the show Naked and Afraid?
That's what I call hide and seek with my uncle.
The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.
My friend was showing me his tool shed and pointed to a ladder. "That's my stepladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
Your mama is so nasty.
She showed up to Red Lobster with her own crabs.
Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the concert?
Because he wanted to reach new heights in his performance.
Stories like Rudolph and Wonder show that different means worse.
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
What's an orphan's least favorite show? Family Guy ;)
It’s not like they can watch it anyway: it’s PG.
Jimmy Savile should have presented Pop off the Tops instead of Top of the Pops.
Why do shows have a family? Because they are "Pair-rents"!
Q: Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
A: Because all shows and movies have a cast.
What TV series do orphans hate?
"House, M.D."
A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."
What is a show an orphan will never be able to relate to?
"Full House".