Short jokes
"Ouch!"
"What's wrong?"
"I stepped on a screw."
"Are you ok?"
"I'm in ex-screw-ciating (excruciating) pain!"
What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.
None.
Are you a dog because you're a fucking bitch?
Are you a rope? Cause I'm tryna put you around my neck 😏
I want a bigger couch.
Why? You're going to be in the kitchen most of the time anyway.
What's the difference between an orphan and an Egyptian?
Egyptians have mummies.
They call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me poor and ugly.
Mia: I'm pregnant again, Paul. I can't wait for you to come home.
Paul: I got a tree to hit on the way.
Who's the closest family member to Paul Walker?
Answer: The tree.
I love the word legs.
Wanna help me spread the word?
Why do animals cross the road?
Because it is funny, do you say "dogs" and "cats?"
Spell "attic."
Okay. A-T-T-I-C. /a titi/ tata. I see.
Why are there no Africans on cruise ships from Africa to America?
Once again, they don't fall for the trick!
Do you ever look at a person and think, "Just how many generations of inbreeding did it take to create you?"
What do you call a group of jumping Mexicans?
Border hoppers! LOL.
Why can’t the disabled kid live on the corner?
Because he’s disabled.
What did Andrew Tate say to the fat kid?
"I miss you."
I have a rooster farm because I love small cocks.
I saw a depressed kid and I gave him a lamp to lighten up his day.
Man yelling at mailman realizes he's opening the mailbox.
Mailman: "There's a pipe bomb in your mailbox..."