Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? – A barber.

Why does sumo wrestlers shave their legs?

Because they don’t want to be mistaken as feminists

What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? – Shear madness.

If you’re gonna razor yourself you might as well have shaving cream.

johnny was watching TV when you hear them say bitch and bastards so he ask hes dad “what is a bitch and bastard.” dad say “a bitch is a female and a bastard is a mail.” then johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say ass and shit so he ask hes dad what shit and ass means dad says “a shit is shaving creme like what i’m putting on my face and ass is a coat why don’t you bug your mom.” so johnny goes back to the TV and then they say fuck so johnny ask his mom what fuck means mom says "fuck means carving like doing to the turkey then a few minutes later Johnny hears a knock on the door so he answers it he then says “welcome bitch and bastard may i tack your ass” the people then ask wear hes parents are johnny says "my dad is putting shit on hes face and my mom i fucking the turkey.

Sir, I mustache you a question… Ah, never mind, I’ll just shave it for later.

Knock Knock?

Mustache

I mustache you a question, but I shave It for later!

Bitch: Nice eyes brows

Me: Yeah wears yours motherfucker

Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thoughts it would look cool)

Whats the worst thing about eating a shaved pussy

Putting the diaper back on

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