Scientist jokes
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
What does a computer scientist do when someone tries to fight him?
He waves his arms like a space invader.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
He was saying jokes, and someone said, "You are on a roll!"
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?
He can't do stand-ups.
Stephen Hawking is ALIVE!
Why did Stephen Hawking roll across the road? Because he had amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.
What’s impossible?
Steven Walkings.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
Runner beans.
Why did the people think Stephen Hawking was disrespectful?
'Cause he didn't stand up for the national anthem.
There were once these two twins. One twin, no matter what happened, was always pissed off, while the other one was always happy.
This baffled scientists, so they ran an experiment on the twins to figure out what was happening. They took the angry one and left him in a room with all of the latest technology and the most expensive toys and left him overnight. When they came back, he was still grumpy. When they asked him why, he said, "None of these are actually mine, and you left me in here all night, so I'm angry!"
His explanation was reasonable, so they ran another experiment on the other kid. This time, they left him overnight in a room that was literally just filled with horse shit. When they came back to check on him the next morning, he was still smiling. When they asked him why, he said, "With all of this horse crap, there has to be a pony in here somewhere!"
What’s Stephen Hawking's favorite song? Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes.
Steven Hawking lost the Wi-Fi connection on March 14, 2018.
Stephen Hawking Kobi talking.
It’s so sad because Stephen Hawking can’t even stand up for himself after all these mean jokes.
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
Because it’s a stairway to heaven, not a ramp.
Yes, Stephen Hawking is alive.
YEET!
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He lost WiFi connection.
Have you ever walked in to Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.