Really Jokes

really bad penis joke

You know, people should really stop making fun of 911....both my parents died.

One driving one plane, and the other driving the other.

A guy walks with a young boy into the woods. The boy turns to him and says, “Hey mister, it’s getting really dark and I’m scared.” The man replies, “How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone.

Abortion, it really brings out the kid in you.

JFK was one of the most open-minded presidents. It really blows my mind how great he was.

Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now

Teacher: People with Depression never get anywhere in life. Student 1: My mom has depression, but she died. Student 2: My sister has depression and she's going to Therapy. Student 3: My Dad Has depression, and he's Doing REALLY Well

Me, trying to interact with people: “Hey, are you a rope? Because I really wanna HANG with you”

Person I’m talking to: *Pulling out phone to call suicide hotline* “haha what”

I was raised an only child, which really pissed my brother.

Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl? I’d really like to meter

Window Problems A blonde texts her husband on a cold winter’s morning: "Windows frozen, won't open." Husband texts back: "Gently pour some lukewarm water over it and gently tap edges with hammer." Wife texts back 5 minutes later: "Computer really messed up now.”

What is a pirate's favorite letter?

You'd think it'd be R, but really his heart will always belong to the C.

i fell from the stairs the other day. it really "got me down".

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.

Man looks at his friend and says "if you and a friend go camping and you two get really drunk and in the morning you wake up with a condom in your butt would you tell anyone? " The friend says im a disgusted tone "No" So the man says "ok let's go camping"

Neo-Confederates all claim to be about "heritage" not "hate". Well, if your heritage consists of Kelly Clarkson, riding on siblings, and treating Donald Trump as if he's the second coming, then it really sucks to be you.

Person 1: stop making suicidal jokes!? Person 2: okay okay, I’ll cut it out. Person 1: really? Person 2: their not even that deep.

If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered suislide?

Asking for a friend.

Michael Jakson gets really ill so he's rushed to hospital. When they get there he says 'am i in heaven?' The doctor replies 'Nah sir we're just taking a quick shortcut through the children's ward.'