Property jokes

Why did the orphan cross the road?

To get to the real estate agent.

Why has nobody been on Neptune? Because the wind is so big. And why the wind's so big? Because Neptune's yelling, "GETT OFFF MMY PPRROOPERRTY!!"

"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."

There's only one gender. Women are property.

The reason why women have suffered longer than men is because men are using women and abusing them as tools and property, which they aren’t.

During WWII, women were used every day by evil men for not being able to have sex with their wives, and Muslim women are being raped, women children are being raped every day while you fucking turds of human shit are making jokes of issues that need to stop, so stop with the homophobia, Islamophobia, biphobia and all the other phobias, make sexual harassment, assault and rape victims' voices heard, we will not stay silent because of this shitty app!

Also, God created women equally as men, do not mistreat your sisters, mothers, aunts, mother-in-laws. Hope all you rapists, sexual abusers, sexual assaulters rot in hell where you deserve to be, not in this country or any other place, hell is where you belong. 😡🤬🖕🏻🖕🏼🖕🏽🖕🏾🖕🏿

If the moon landing was fake, so is your house.

You know what they say: "Location, location, location." So my dad stuck a thermometer up his butt, and now he has degrees.

A farmer had a donkey and a dog. One night, he was getting robbed by a thief. The donkey told the dog to bark, but the dog refused. So the donkey brayed very loudly, and the thief ran out of the house, and the farmer beat up the donkey.

What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.

Yo head so big I can skate on yo head.

I'm talking bout real real big, set a plate on yo head, charge a phone on yo head, build a home on yo head, studio wide, write a song on yo head.

Flippity floppity, women are property.

Yo mama so ugly, she has a sign in her garden saying, “Beware of the dog!”

123 bipity bopity 321. Women are property.

It's not Minecraft.

It's Ourcraft!

How do you enter your house?

Through Bill Gates!

I was at my grandparents' and saw someone breaking into a car. I told my grandpa, "He's trying to break into the car!" He said, "No, ours is in the garden."

I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.

I found an alien in my backyard. I put him to work. He went to a farm, and I never saw him again. Moments later, he is on the Daily Planet acting as a reporter. A green rock smashed my house. I called him back, and he passed out.

I remarked, "You lazy!"

Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"

Someone stole my balls :(