What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.
Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.
Not to mention and by plane.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Yes, houses can't jump at all.
If the moon landing was fake, so is your house.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To get to the real estate agent.
Why do they call them apartments when they are together?
Why are wives also called a housekeeper?
Because after the divorce, they keep the house.
Yesterday we lost a quarter of our roof in the storm, oof.
What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?
The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.
How many genders are there?
One, women are property.
What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.
Someone stole my balls :(
It's not Minecraft.
It's Ourcraft!
What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, because they are walls.
Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!
Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.
That made my father very mad, as we didn't have a fireplace.
What do a brand new house, me, and new jewelry box have in common?
We're all empty on the inside.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
Have you ever walked into Jason Fraser’s house?
Neither has he.
A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.
First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.
