Putin's Brain:
Look, I'm innocent. I was just going on vacation in NY, but my co-pilot said: "Hit it with your best shot."
What's harder than steel? Joe Biden at a playground.
why is biden a priest? so kids call him father
Some of the most convincing people you'll ever listen to are born liars; usually they're called politicians.
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
Shrek and the Hulk became politicians.
And they created The Green Party.
My name is Joe Biden, and I forgot this message.
My name is Joe Biden, and I am running for US Senate.
There's nothing I like more than seeing a politician in a nice suit.
An orange jumpsuit that is :)
What do you call the Christian version of Donald Trump? Holy shit!
What is the difference between Joe Biden and a knife?
A knife has a point.
What do you call a decapitated politician?
A severed head of state.
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?
What do you get when you cross a fat christian nationalist that is heteroflexable, a christian nationalist politician who is also a born again christian, a conservative republican that has a small penis, and a tv evangelist on steroids?
What do you get when you cross a panhandler, a politician, a lobbyist, a prostitute, a sodomite, and a Jehovah's Witness knocking on your door at your house to convert you to their religion?
It was so cold out today believe it or not, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets!
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
I went to a museum and saw clocks. The owner told me these were lying clocks.
"This is God's clock. It never moved because he never lied."
"This is your clock. It moved 3 times because you lied 3 times."
I asked where is President Trump's clock. He said it was at the equator, spinning super fast for those who were on fire. I laughed so hard because it was so true!
What did Darth Trump Vader say to evil emperor Putin?
"Yesssss Massager!"
