Physicist jokes
What do you call a person that can't operate a wheelchair?
Stephen Hawking.
Why was Stephen Hawking never trusted when taking a quiz?
"No computers allowed on the test!"
They say Jesus walked on water.
That's nothing. Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and his wheelchair?
At least his wheelchair can pull a woman.
Funny how "Hawking" rhymes with "talking" and "walking," and he can't do either.
And the first four letters of his Christian name spell "step," and he also can't do that.
I love Steven Hawking's stand-up comedy!
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
1 "Knock knock."
2 "Who's there?"
1 "Interrupting physicist."
2 "Interrupting who?"
1 "Muon!!!"
I like balls.
What was wrong with Stephen Hawking? His legs.
A fat man was checking his weight and sucking in his fat belly. A physicist saw it and said that's not how the law of conservation of mass works.
Plot twist: The fat man jumped on the physicist and proved him wrong. Now the physicist doesn't have mass.
What is Stephen Hawking's least favorite movie?
Standing Tall.
So, Stephen Hawking walked into a bar—oh, wait a minute! Rewind!
So, Stephen Hawking rolled into a bar......
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? You can't stand up.
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.
I’m just kidding.
It’s so sad because Stephen Hawking can’t even stand up for himself after all these mean jokes.
Why isn't Stephen Hawking going to heaven?
Because he's British.
I wonder if Stephen Hawking has ever watched Avengers: Endgame... Oh wait, he can't.
Stephen Hawking walked in a bar...
Just kidding.
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one-liners?
Because he can’t do stand up.