Period jokes
What do you call it when a girl on her period goes swimming?
A blood bath.
If you eat her out on her period, does that make you Cunt Dracula?
Why did the teacher get the death penalty? Because she gave an orphan homework. That's on period. #darkhumor
What's the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player changes his pads every third period.
Why did the girl rage badly when she got an D- on her essay?
Because the teacher said she missed all her periods.
Your forehead's so big, it's built like Megamind's robot, period.
Girls: 🙏 *Period* ✍️💅
Men: 🗿 *Growth* 🗿🗿🗿
Woman jokes aren't funny, period.
I make chemistry jokes periodically.
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!
Three doctors go into a room to get rid of a dead guy's body. They notice when they walk over that he has a boner. The first doctor decides, "Why not fuck him? He still has a boner left in him." The second says, "Well, he's dead, and I am a virgin." The third one says, "I can't, I'm on my period," and then says, "Okay, why not? He's already dead. It's not like he doesn't smell bad." After all that, they go to walk out, and the guy pops up and says, "Thanks for saving my life, pumping blood back into my body..."
How do you know that your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes weird.
Know what a 6.9 is?
Another good thing screwed up by a period.
Some girl just walks into my 6th period geography class. The first thing I think is, "Oh shit! It's mini Regina George without titties!"
How do you know if your sister's on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes funny.
What's worse than fingering your sister?
Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.
What did the lesbian vampire say to the heterosexual woman after she was done licking her pussy after she was done having her blood period?
"I will be back next month."
How can you tell if your sister is on her period?
Your father's dick tastes funny.
What is a girl's favorite song when they are on their period?
"Period, oh period, oww!"
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.