Pen

Pen jokes

Bar

  • I was in a bar in Italy. Me and a hot chick got along, so I asked her for her number. I remembered that there was a pen in my pocket, but when I searched, it was nowhere to be found. I turned back, then I saw Pessi running with it. Shame on you, Pessi, for ruining my night! 😭

  • 1
  • Vacation

  • One day I was very happy. I managed to win the lottery and receive a free vacation trip to Saudi Arabia!

    Everything was going well until suddenly the FRAUD appeared! It was him, PRISTIANO PENALDO! He dived toward me and grabbed my lottery ticket. I asked him why he is doing this, only for him to reply "I need trip to Saudi Arabia to statpad the PENS!" as he dived back through my window.

    Shame on you for stealing my vacation and ruining my day! You are no longer my Idol Pristianooooo!

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  • 9/11

  • I have a pen, I have an Apple, um, Apple pen.

    The Taliban had a plane, the US had a building boom, 9/11.

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  • Professor

  • I was studying in Turin, and my professor told me I had to use PENS only.

    I looked in my bag for pens, and they were GONE. I looked at the surveillance footage and saw that CRISTIANO PENALDO stole ALL MY PENS. I was fuming. Shame on you, Penaldo!

  • 2
  • Penaldo

  • I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.

  • 1
  • EpiPen

  • Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?

    Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.

    Dad: She had to take the deep penis.

    Son: Umm...... WHAT!?

    Dad: I had to inject her with and EPIC PENIS.

    Dad: Oh, for God's sakes.

    Dad: Epi Pen.

  • 1
  • Penaldo

  • It was a sunny day and I was in school. I had history lessons and we had a cool subject! The subject was about Penaldo, the man who statpadded against small teams and camped in the pen spot! Our teacher showed us a map with marked countries in which Penaldo dived like a dolphin!

  • 0
  • Job Interview

  • A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said, "You are what we are looking for, but I need to test your skills." He hands her a pen. He said, "Sell me this pen." She puts it between her boobs.

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  • Rizz

  • Rizz,

    Are you a biographer? Cause I picture us together.

    Can I take a picture of you for I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

    No pen, no paper, you still draw my attention.

    You know what I hate about math? They always talk about x and y, but not about u and i.

  • 1
  • Penaldo

  • You caught a Penaldo!

    Description: Penaldo, the finished statpadder. It is said that Penaldo drains the energy of its teammates and sells underwears.

    Type: Ghost type.

    Moves: Dive

    Disappear in big games

    Cry for pens

    Statpad vs farmers

    Sells underwear

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  • Orphan

  • How do you break an orphan's wall in their room in the orphanage?

    Tell them to put a tally on the wall with a pen for every second their parents are missing.

    Ghost

  • Eibar-Man! Eibar-Man! Does whatever a ghost can.

    Scores a tapin With Xaviesta’s assistance. Misses a pen From close distance.

    Lookout! Here comes the Eibar-man!

  • 1
  • Friend

  • My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.

    We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!

  • 1