Parent Jokes

A toddler, was giving her daddy a tea party She brought him a little cup of "tea" which was just water, of course. After several cups of tea , her Mom came home, Dad made her wait in the living room to watch his little Princess bring him a cup of tea, because it was, "Just the cutest thing!" Mom waited, and sure enough, here she come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watches him drink it up and then says, "You know the only place she can reach water, is the toilet!

Today I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door on my face. My parents are the worst.

Parents: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage, Kid: why? Parents: so you don't get bored there

teacher: if u keep talking over me i'll call your parents! Orphan: YOU WILL?

Dont see why people say that babysitting a toddler is hard. You just grease the bathtub, put them inside with some food and drink, and go do your business. I guarantee you that they will still be there when you return. If you stay in the house, you might need to use sound cancelling headphones too though.

Guys, we should stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents will get mad. Oh.... Wait... Continue.

What happened when your parents dropped you off at the orphanage?, They got sued for littering

Kid: "Hey, are you an orphan?" Friend: "Yeah, but you are too." Kid: "At least my parents wanted me."

*Hears the news about Sandy Hook* Person 1:God,I can only imagine what was going through those kids heads in the last moments of their lives... Person 2:Probably Bullets Person 1:OMG!!Can you even think of what their parents are going through?! Person 2:Probably Coffin Brochures Person 1:.... Person 2:Its called dark humor.Dark humor is like food,not everyone gets it.

I have an orphan joke, but it needs parental guidance.

Parents: "OH! honey, we were just wrestling!"

Little Johnny: "OK! I'll join you!"

What did the orphan say to his parents, nothing cause they left him.

A woman buys a house, but she doesn't know what to name the house. So she stuck her head outside and heard 'Hairy butt', so she named the House hairy butt. The next month she had a baby, but she didn't know what to name him. So she stuck her head outside and heard 'crack, so she named the baby crack. After a year or two she lost him so she called the police and said'Help! I looked all over my hairy butt but I couldn't find my little crack.

What did the Asian parents say when they had a disabled kid?Sum ting wong. 💀💀

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put doorknobs on a wall and said, "Open the door."

I asked a kid at my work where his parents were. He started crying. Man, I don't know what I did. I'll ask another kid at the orphanage.

when you forget the pinata at the birthday party. kids: Aww man. but the emo kid just hung himself. kids:Yaaaaayyy. Parents: Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way