Parent jokes

Teacher: "You can't be here after school without a parent!"

Orphan: -no response-

What did Hitler say after his parents bought a hauler?

How much did the haulla-cost?

What do you call a blonde in the freezer?

Her parents named her Cindy, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.

How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? They handed her a basketball and told her to “read this book”.

What's the hardest part of riding a scooter?

Telling your parents you are gay.

Why can’t an orphan get suspended or expelled from school? Because they need to contact parents.

Is it bad to hit an orphan?

It's not like they'll tell their parents.

Orphan: I wish to be like Batman.

Genie: Your wish is granted.

Orphan goes home. His parents are dead.

What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.

Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.

A teacher gives her kindergarten students four flavors of lifesavers, and they have to guess the flavors. The students guess cherry, lime, and orange. They don't know the last flavor. So, the teacher gives them a hint and says, "It's what your parents call each other." [honey] But a little girl shouts and says, "OMG, they're assholes."

Sam is a kindergartener. One day, Sam’s teacher told him to learn the first few letters of the alphabet. Later that night, Sam asked his moody sister what the first letter of the alphabet was, and she replied with “Oh, what’s the point. Life is meaningless...”.

Sam then went up to his room and found his brother crying on the floor. Sam asked him what the next letter was. “I hate you!” said Sam’s brother, so Sam left the room. Sam went to his mom and asked her what the third letter was. “You stupid f*****,” his mom yelled at him. So Sam went to ask his Grandpa what the fourth letter is, and his grandpa didn’t reply, so Sam went to bed.

The next day, Sam’s teacher called on him to tell the class what the first letter is, and he answered with “Oh, what’s the point. Life is meaningless...” and the teacher sent him to the school counselor. As he left the room, he yelled at his teacher “I hate you!”

As Sam arrived at the counselor’s office, she said she had called his parents and they wanted him to be safe and locked up in a padded cell. “You stupid f*****,” Sam screamed as he heard the ambulance sirens getting nearer. As the ambulance drove away, Sam, in his straight jacket, was silent.

Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?

Because they are aimed at a younger audience.

Why was Sally at the hospital after her parents left? Because they put her up for adoption.

My friends: Ugh, why are you so lazy and no fun?

My parents: Why can't you be like your siblings?

My teacher: I don't care if you're depressed, focus on your study!

The songs: We understand you :)

I asked a kid where their parents were...

Lol

If an orphan gets a girlfriend, they finally have someone to love them.

"I think my baby is so similar to me!"

"True, but the most important thing is that he is healthy!"

Why do orphans have a single chip? Because they don't have a full bag.

What does water see in orphans that they don't? Their parents.