Parent jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why are orphans lonely?
Because they don't have parents to talk to.
What is the similarity between Hitler and orphans?
They both don't have parents.
Why did the orphan live at school?
Because on the first day his parents didn’t pick him up.
Why can't orphans have a Christmas list? Because they can't give it to their parents to tell Santa.
Well we learned our lesson don't make a baby mad...
Bully (😏): Name 3 things you don't have.
Orphan named Kaiel (😔): Um... a dog... a doll... and a credit card.
Bully (😡): NO!
Orphan named Kaiel (😟): Sorry, what???
Bully (🤣): Parents. Family. And a home with people you love.
Why do orphans not have parents?
Answer: Their parents are yeet dead dead.
Why can’t orphans have a house pet?
Because its parents have it to itself.
Why can orphans get away with being bad at school? Because when the teacher says, "I want to have a parent/teacher conference," they just go about their day.
A school shooter enters a kindergarten classroom. Little Timmy says, “He’s my daddy!”
The teacher, Mr. Mortez, screams. Little Timmy then says, “Mr. Mortez, my daddy says you’re a big fat whale and he wants to roll you all the way to Canada!” *pushes Mr. Mortez* Little Timmy says, “Hail f**king Canada!”
Why can't Jordan moan?
Because his parents are in the room next to him. Asleep.
A neighbor went up to me and asked me where my parents were. When I said, "In the bed," my neighbor said, "Oooooohh, how long is the penis?" I said, "Wait here," and I interrupted my parents while they were doing some "business" and asked my dad the exact question he said. Then he spanked me.
Adopted kid: I made a big mistake!
Dad: You are one.
I wrote a few jokes:
What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off.
Yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex. I could not think that her mother is so hot.
What will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast.
How do people get skinny?
Their parents don't feed them. (JOKE)
Why did your parents abandon you?
Because the first thing you dad said to be was; "GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WIFE."
Why can't orphans play catch?
Because they don't have parents to catch the ball.
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor.
Police: Where is your neighbor’s house?
Me: If I tell you, you won’t believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house.
Why don’t orphans have phones?? Because their parents can’t buy them one.
Why can't orphans go to a five-star hotel?