Parent jokes
Why couldn't the girl with no arms hug her parents?
Because she had none of the above.
If you're ever bored, jump on Vedanta, what is he going to do, tell his parents? (He probably will.)
Why don’t orphans have parents?
'Cause they were abandoned.
Dad: You're adopted.
Son: Where are my real parents?
Dad: >:D They are dead, now come to their grave and sleep there.
My dad.
Mrs. Harolen: Students, tomorrow's assignment is to bring your parents to school for a conference with the teacher information.
Garen: I want to know who cannot bring their parents to a conference. ORPHANS!
Students: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Mrs. Harolen: Garen sit down! NOW!
Garen: Hey, why can't orphans get a dog? They don't have their parents to drive them to the animal shelter.
Halen: Yeah! Why are orphans racist? Because they never saw their parents with a different race!
Students: No, that's not funny!
Student: SHUT UP!
Lil Johnny came home one day and said, "What do fucking each other mean?"
Then he walked through the living room and his dad was fucking his mom, so oh.
Why is the orphan so dumb?
Because he didn’t have parents to pay for it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
A school shooter enters a kindergarten classroom. Little Timmy says, “He’s my daddy!”
The teacher, Mr. Mortez, screams. Little Timmy then says, “Mr. Mortez, my daddy says you’re a big fat whale and he wants to roll you all the way to Canada!” *pushes Mr. Mortez* Little Timmy says, “Hail f**king Canada!”
What is the similarity between Hitler and orphans?
They both don't have parents.
Why are orphans lonely?
Because they don't have parents to talk to.
Why did the orphan live at school?
Because on the first day his parents didn’t pick him up.
Why can orphans get away with being bad at school? Because when the teacher says, "I want to have a parent/teacher conference," they just go about their day.
Why do orphans not have parents?
Answer: Their parents are yeet dead dead.
Why can’t orphans have a house pet?
Because its parents have it to itself.
Why can't orphans have a Christmas list? Because they can't give it to their parents to tell Santa.
Bully (😏): Name 3 things you don't have.
Orphan named Kaiel (😔): Um... a dog... a doll... and a credit card.
Bully (😡): NO!
Orphan named Kaiel (😟): Sorry, what???
Bully (🤣): Parents. Family. And a home with people you love.
Why can't Jordan moan?
Because his parents are in the room next to him. Asleep.
A neighbor went up to me and asked me where my parents were. When I said, "In the bed," my neighbor said, "Oooooohh, how long is the penis?" I said, "Wait here," and I interrupted my parents while they were doing some "business" and asked my dad the exact question he said. Then he spanked me.