Parent jokes
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your parents.
An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.
1 like = 1 more child in my basement.
When you forget the pinata at the birthday party. The kids: "Aww man." But the emo kid just hung himself. Kids: "Yaaaaayyy." Parents: "Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way."
Today, I filmed an unboxing video at my friend's funeral.
His parents weren't too happy.
Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.
One man's trash is another man's treasure, he said when he found out his parents split up and he is being adopted.
Hey guys, I have a question.
Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?
Teenager: "OMG, I’m prego, my mom's gonna kill me."
Baby: "Lmao, same"
Girl: Come over.
Orphan: I can’t.
Girl: My parents aren’t home.
Orphan: Oh, cool, something we have in common.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?
What can Miles Morales do that Spiderman can't?
Hug his parents.
Why can’t orphans be criminals?
Because they’re not wanted!
The Emo kid wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.
When you are being spoon-fed and your mum says, "Here comes the airplane."
What did the orphan say to its parents?
"Hey, Mom and Dad—oh wait, you're not my parents. I don't have none. Will you adopt me, please?"
They people: "No."
How do Taliban parents feed their babies?
"Here comes the plane... weeee, BOOM! 💥"
One man's trash is another man's treasure. That sucks when you are adopted.