My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are... But I laugh more.
According to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.
The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember, in the 1980's they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope.
In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash, and no Hope!
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.
Why do women have cleaner minds than men? Because they change theirs more often.
Things we all do:
Call the Royal blue tang fish the "Dory fish," and the Clownfish "Nemo fish"! 🤣
I do this too often!
The first trains were often derailed. They had a bad track record.
"Me tells dad joke often."
"I want to hear it."
"Me? You wouldn't get it."
It did not rain very often when Chuck Norris was a kid.
Why?
Because his favorite childhood song was "Rain Rain Go Away."
People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.
How often do emos go swimming in a lifetime?
Just once.
I was on the Official Cristiano Ronaldo website, when suddenly my Anti-Virus software showed an alert on my screen! The notification read "WARNING: FRAUD DETECTED!" I was shocked but not surprised. Penaldo has been finished for years after all, and he often ghosts in big games.
Q. why do orphans hate fast and furious movies A. cuz they say family to often
What comes to visit more often then your aunt your acne
Q: I often think I'm ugly, but then I think of my sister and get over it.
A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"
The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."
Why doesn’t Ganon search the web very often? Because there’s too many links.
Little Johnny attends school regularly and often brings a box of sultanas as a gift to his favorite teacher.
One morning Little Johnny attends class without a box of sultanas.
The teacher enquires, why Johnny "where is my box of sultanas?"
Johnny replied, "Sorry, miss, my rabbit died."
How do you know someone is autistic?
They get stuck in a loop very often.
People often ask me what I would do for a klondike bar well I straight up put 5 hijackers on flight 175 before it departed from logan airport at 8:14a.m. on September 11 2001
