Not jokes

Worst jokes ever? More like I killed an old man in 2012 in Oklahoma City at that nasty Red Lobster, not the one near the freeway, and hid the body in a creek!

Why would the chicken not cross the road?

Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)

Did Jesus die a virgin?

Of course not, you idiot. He got nailed before he died!

What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"

Person: You're so ugly.

Me: You ugly.

Person: I'm not a mirror.

Me: And I'm not your reflection.

I remember when I was a kid, I thought the world used to be colorless.

I was kinda right. They used to not let colors in a lot of areas.

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  • Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?

    1. Listening to your teacher.

    2. Not having your phone/game/TV.

    3. Not having nicotine.

    My cousin said being gay was such a pain in the ass and I asked him why and I said, "Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, I get made fun of." and I said, "Why? Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, turd." Then I said, "Wow, at least I'm not the one with real pains in my ass, bro."

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  • Wife: Stop telling rape jokes, it's not funny. Husband: Who raped you this morning?