Worst Jokes Ever
What's Damo's favorite food?
Big slongs.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
How do you make a plumber cry?
You kill his family.
Why can't a dinosaur clap? Because it's dead.
Why did Bob fall off the swing while playing? Because he had no arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there?
Not Bob.
Why did Susan drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus.
What did the brother cell say when the sister cell stepped on his foot? Ow, mitosis! (my toe, sis)
Cameron and Pav.
What did the skeleton say before dinner? "Bone appetit." His whole family found that humerus.
What do you call Stephen Hawking's wife? Siri.
They say masturbation is better with a dead arm. Apparently, I ruined that funeral.
How do you name a Chinese person?
You drop a metal spoon on a tile floor.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
What do you call a person with only one arm?
Half-assed.
What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
What is the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage. :)
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was outstanding in his field!
Jesus could walk on water, and Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.