Oofer.
Your momma's so fat, when she asked for a water bed, they put a blanket over the ocean.
Can a box match? No, but a tin can.
I wanna die.
I was gonna tell a rumor about butter, but I don’t want to spread it.
I was gonna tell you a pun about a bin but,
bin there, done that.
Why did the chicken want to cross the road? Because he was suicidal and wanted to get hit by a car.
Two nuns in a bath.
When I ask my dad if I got adopted, he said, "Not yet, no one wants you."
¿Hola, quién es?
Stephen Hawking died because he did a wheelie and unplugged his charger.
The reason Stephen Hawking died was because his ethernet cable disconnected.
Did you know that statistically, 1 in 10 people live next to a pedophile? Not me though, I live next to a 10 year old boy with a fat ass.
Me and my cancer
Are like a game of Fortnite.
I’ll never win.
When do astronauts eat lunch?
At launch time.
The teacher told me to put my MP3 away, so I brought out my MP5. Now that bitch knows what not to tell me.
A man walked into a bar. No wait, a horse,
A man walked into a horse.
What do you call a ride that drops 180 degrees?
Cold as hell.
Why did Anna give Carson a blowjob?
He made her.
Why did the tall building fall?
It was September 11th.
