Worst Jokes Ever

A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.

He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"

Why do orphans go to church?

It’s the only place they can call someone “father.”

You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end.

My friend had a house FULL of okra, but it blew up and okra was everywhere.

I guess you can call that place Okra-homa!

Why can’t the T-Rex clap his hands?

Because he is DEAD.

Don't touch my pickles - they are very picklish.

Orphan jokes are like families, not everyone gets 'em.

(Also, I banged ya mum ;))

If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

You're gay.

Hey, wanna hear a joke?

Yeah, me too.

Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.

Person 1 says to Person 2: "I know a man with a wooden leg named Smith."

So Person 2 says to Person 1: "What's the name of his other leg?"

There's something special about cemeteries.

People are dying to get inside.

I still to this day remember my grandpa's last words.

"I'M ALLERGIC TO FUCKING CATS!"

What's worse than locking your keys in the car in front of an abortion clinic?

Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.

My sister's boyfriend is mad because I fucked his girl.

I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.

I met a drum circle once, they were a huge hit!

Why did Sally get a black eye? Because she decided to play football.

Why did Jimmy throw his clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly.