Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

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Why did the United Nations stop the French government from using the guillotine in public?

Because the French government was using the guillotine on newborn babies for circumcision.

When the washer started running, why did you join me?

Because I had to catch it.

Did you hear the one about the deaf person?

Me: No.

That's because they can't hear, so they don't talk.

This boy said, "Get your hairline straight." I said, "Girls don't have a hairline. How about you go to the barber shop and let your barber do your hair 10 times worse than he did the first time."

I'm a Model. My doctor asked me to make an acronym for POST because I post pictures on Instagram.

(Trying to) P-ut O-ff Suicidal T-houghts

Me: Says to kid at adoption center, "You're adopted!"

Me and kid: hug.

Thought this site needed a little bit of nice jokes.

My friend loves playing Roulette, so I figured I would introduce him to Russian Roulette. Blew his mind.

My girlfriend and I played Russian Roulette once.

We had sex afterwards even though she lost.

what's the difference between hitler and you?

one didn't keep posting on twitter about killing themselves.

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    • What's the difference between my dad and the milk man? The milk man comes back with the goddamn milk.

    There are days I feel really bad for my Wife. She has to feed me in the same place I take a dump.

    She really hates it when I spit my food back out.

    I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.

    God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.