Worst Jokes Ever
Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A. Ask your mother.
I just wish I went on a date with Ariana Grande, and then everybody knew I fucked Ariana Grande.
How did Gertie Gorilla make the Playboy magazine?
She was ape-ril!
What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner? A kong-vict.
What is a gorilla's favorite cookie?
It's chocolate chimp.
I caught my wife having s*x with another guy.
Americans are fat.
I put a magnet in my butthole and made the teachers smell it.
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy."
When you split Uranus in half, it is "ur-anus." That's why it has a butts joke. Weird.
Two (DYM 112)
My dad went to go buy milk, but he walks as slow as my grandmother.
My grandmother is paralyzed in the legs.
Genders are a lot like the Twin Towers.
There used to be two, but now it’s just a sensitive topic.
When did I realize COVID was serious?
When I saw your teeth social distancing.
Why did Beyonce say "to the left to the left"?
Because women don't have rights.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Dude, I lied.
What do you call an annoyed octopus?
Octopissy.
I see you.