"My friend and her boyfriend were kissing until she puts her tongue down his throat, and what happens next is really weird."
The tongue gets stuck in his throat and starts to guh-guh-gughhh trying to get her tongue out of his throat, but it cumssssss out with spit all over his tongue, then they break up because he didn't want that to happen ever again...:/
Like if you are a simp.
Wanna know why I don’t make suicidal jokes?
Because I am one.
What do you call Snoop Dogg’s giant turd?
Poop Logg.
I call this my great talk with Siri.
Me: Hey Siri, give me a "yo mama" joke.
Siri: My mother? Huh?
Me: Did I stutter?
Siri: Interesting question.
Me: It wasn’t a question.
Siri: I’m not sure I understand?
Me: You should understand.
Siri: Hmm... Is there something else I can help with?
Me: No, you b***.
Your mom is so old, she walked into an antique store and they kept her.
Your mom is so dumb, she called me asking for my phone #.
What’s brown, fuzzy, and wears sunglasses?
A coconut on vacation.
My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.
Why does an orphan wanna be a criminal?
Because they wanna be wanted.
Why can’t an orphan use an iPhone?
Because it can’t find the home button.
Guys, these jokes are not funny. My dad died, he was the best Arabic pilot ever.
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?
OLD KLADYBOFSIYTFJT
Why did the bee go to the doctors?
Answer: Because he had hives.
Where does a cow take his date?
Answer: To the moooooovies!
I will always remember my grandma's last words: "What are you doing with that pillow?"
Suck my balls!
Why do people love dating orphans?
Because they're always home alone.
What do you call a disabled Chinese person?
Sum Ting Wong.
What did Michael Scott say to someone when he passed a plate of vegetables?
Boom! Roasted!
