Necrophilia jokes

A necrophiliac woman goes over to her friend's house after hooking up.

"Was it hung?" her friend asks.

"No, he was shot."

One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac.

I used to be into necrophilia. Until that rotten cunt split on me...

I love necrophilia, but only if it's consensual!

What does a necrophiliac get at a wedding?

Mourning wood.

How did the necrophiliac get caught?

Some rotten cunt split on him....

A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing.

Man: "Ah, suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump?" Lady: "Yep. I hate this world." Man: "Well, if you're gonna die, can we have sex before you jump?" Lady: "Hell no! You creep!" Man: "Ok, fine. I guess I'll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore."

What's the difference between a chocolate cake and a dead baby?

About 5000 calories.

Place a man in a morgue, he'll try to leave.

Place a doctor in a morgue, he'll go to work.

Place a necrophiliac in a morgue, he'll stay happy for a week.

What is a necrophiliac's favorite candy? A Hearsey's Kiss.

What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.

Digging stuff up is too hard.

I guess necrophilia isn’t for everybody.

Is necrophilia considered cracking open a cold one?

Necrophilia in Alabama is fun for the whole family, even grandma.