Necrophilia

Necrophilia jokes

A necrophiliac woman goes over to her friend's house after hooking up.

"Was it hung?" her friend asks.

"No, he was shot."

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  • One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

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  • There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac.

    I used to be into necrophilia. Until that rotten cunt split on me...

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  • A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing.

    Man: "Ah, suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump?" Lady: "Yep. I hate this world." Man: "Well, if you're gonna die, can we have sex before you jump?" Lady: "Hell no! You creep!" Man: "Ok, fine. I guess I'll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore."

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  • What's the difference between a chocolate cake and a dead baby?

    About 5000 calories.

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  • Place a man in a morgue, he'll try to leave.

    Place a doctor in a morgue, he'll go to work.

    Place a necrophiliac in a morgue, he'll stay happy for a week.

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  • What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.

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