Miscellaneous jokes
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
Bone-appetit!
What? A telephone? Nah, I'm using a telebone.
How did I know where you would go next?
Oh, I felt it in my bones!
Why are graveyards so noisy?
Because of all the coffin!
When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone!
Why don't skeletons fight each other?
They don't have the guts.
What do skeletons hate the most about wind?
Nothing, it goes right through them.
My brother truly is a numbskull.
My favorite instrument? The TromBONE, of course.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spareribs!
Why can't skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird!
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef.
Why are there so many jokes about Chuck Norris, but not about Bruce Lee?
Bruce Lee was no joking matter.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
We cut and kill flowers because they're pretty.
We cut and kill ourselves because we are not.