Milk jokes
Why can't you eat cereal?
Because your dad never came back from getting the milk!
I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.
The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"
That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.
Five years later, he came back and left again.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
Why didn't the cows eat the lemon grass?
It made sour milk.
What if soy milk is just regular milk trying to introduce itself in Spanish?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Condensed.
Condensed who?
Condensed milk.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Milk man.
Milkman who?
Milk poooooooooooooooop peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep man!
How did Billy find out he was in a minefield?
He saw his dad's corpse holding a jug of milk.
Why do orphans have dry cereal?
Because they're still waiting on the milk.
What is a meatball without spaghetti? A cow.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Kid: Aye, Mum, I'mma do something Dad could never do.
Mum: And that is?
*Kid walks out.*
*Kid comes back in with milk.*
Mum: I'mma beat ya ass!
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
Why couldn’t the dairy farmer find his home? He lost the whey!😅
Cow A: I slept with your sister!
Cow B: Never knew my brother was a girl!
All the other cows:
:O
Oh, he needs some milk!
You better get used to having dry cereal cuz your dad ain't never bringing the milk back.
Where do cows go for entertainment?
The MOOOOvie theater.