Best part about being an orphan?
Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"
My diet consists of Blood Pudding, I love it and have it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, my secret ingredient though?
It consists of the blood and insides of my victims, it’s a bit chunky sometimes, some bits chewy, some bits hard, but it’s a hearty meal.
Hi, how are you? Busy, busy today and tomorrow. I have to go home from home and walk home. Walk and a bike. Walk, walk, and a bike to school tomorrow night. I have to have lunch with my mom and dad, and I have dinner with you tonight.
Do I do the same for dinner tomorrow morning for you?
Yo mama so ugly she made happy meals cry.
Two lions plan their escape from the circus. The night they get out of their cages, they see a lone clown stumbling back from town, drunk, not a soul in sight. Since they are going on the run, they decide to catch one last meal before they hit the road.
As one lion gets a bite of leg, the second takes a piece of shoulder.
Then one stops and asks his companion:
"Does this taste funny to you?"
Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.
Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.
You're so fat you're the reason they made tread "meals".
You're so ugly we can't have neighbors.
"Hey Modda, I'm hungry."
What is your car? What was your time today after I had dinner night and night sleep night? Is it a night for you and a dinner night? Night dinner night? Was the snow? I had dinner night night dinner.
What is a good time for dinner, and what do I do? You can do dinner. Was that it?
What is a good time for dinner and what do I do for you and dinner dinner and what yyyuyy dinner 🍴 night time
What is the difference between a tree house for dinner, and dinner with you today after school?
What did the duck eat for lunch?
Soup and quackers.
Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."
Dad I'm hungry hi hungry I'm dad 👋🍪🍩🍬🌮🍔🍗🍟🍤🍉🍭🍫🍰
What do mice eat for dinner?
Mac n Cheese.
My cat sleeps about 20 hours a day. She has her food prepared for her. She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365. Her meals are provided at no cost to her. She visits the doctor once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this she pays nothing, and nothing is required of her.
She lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than she needs, but she is not required to do any upkeep. If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep. She receives these accommodations absolutely free. She is living like a queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.
I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head, Holy Sh*t, my cat is a Democrat!
What do you call a burger 🍔 with one eye?
A one giant.
They say I’m sliced like the apples in a kids meal.
