Material jokes
Want to hear a joke about paper?
Never mind, it's tearable.
I was going to make a joke about a piece of paper.
It's just too tear-able.
Do you want to hear a joke about paper?
Never mind, it's tear-able.
Yo mama so old the carpenter uses her crotch as sandpaper.
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Rubber-toe.
Son: Mom, can I borrow $50?
Mom: What? NO WAY! Do you think money grows on trees?
Son: Mom, what is money made of?
Mom: Paper.
Son: Where does paper come from?
Mom: . . .
What did the coal say to the charcoal?
You look pretty coal! 🤣
That joke and paper have one thing in common: they're both tearable.
What do you call someone with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What's brown and sticky? A stick with poop on it.
Or a stick with poo on it.
What is sticky, but it cannot stick a stick?
Feel my shirt...it's boyfriend material.
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
I bought a wooden whistle. I tried so hard, but it wouldn't whistle.
So I bought a steel one. It still wouldn't let me whistle. Then I got a lead one. It still wouldn't lead me whistle. Then I realised, they were flutes, so the wood would lead me whistle if I did it correctly. Steel....
What do planets read?
Comet books.
What’s the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
What’s the difference between orphans and cars?
I don’t have 1080 cars in my basement.
What do you call a piece of paper? A piece of paper.
Make him read a book.
What is brown and extremely sticky?
A stick.