Three friends were stuck in the desert they were struggling and trying to find food when. A they found a magical lamp the rubbed it and out came a genie and genie says "each of you friends get to have one wish" so the first friend said I wish to go home same as the second one the third friend said " I'm lonely I wish my friends were with me"
What do you call a magician that makes beer? Brew-dini
How many fingers does the Dragonborn have?
Four fingers and a Thu'um.
What did Gandalf say to Mario? You shell not pass!
Orphan finds genie
Orphan:my first wish is to be Rich
Genie: of course
Orphan:my second wish is to be famous
Genie:done
Orphan: I wish my parents can come back Genie: I told you I can't bring people back from the dead
Three kids one day found a magical slide. There was a sign next to it saying, “what ever you wish for comes true once you slide down”. One kid stepped up and slid down, he wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river. The second kid slid down and wished for a mountain of money, he then landed in a pile of money. The third kid went down and said, “Weeeeeeee”!
If hay is for horses, what is for unicorns? Haaaaaaay
If I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn because they are Beautiful, Majestic, Sparkly, Bright, Gods, They create Joy and Happiness everywhere they go. Unicorns made my life better when I got to know them more, ^-^ they filled my life with more Happiness, I believe in the Unicorns and they'll believe in me, I am not a Unicorn although I am the Princess of the Unicorn Land but if I could be any creature I would be a Unicorn! :P
Them: You want some Lucky Harms?
Me: What are Lucky Harms?
Them: They're Lucky charms, but instead of being magically delicious, they're magically malicious.
how do you start a dance party? go into the PTSD ward of an insane asylum and set off fireworks and watch the magic unfold
so if the reason people used to hang women because they were seen as witches back in the day, if boys were to be hung would they be called wizards?
What did Harry Houdini say when he did his famous vanishing act at a sushi place "Now sashimi now you don't"
What does a wizard say when doing drugs? Injecto Patronum!
what's the most unrealistic part of harry potter??????...
a ginger with friends
A guy walks into a bar and sees a 1-foot piano player over by the door. He goes over to the bartender, orders a beer, and says, “Man, how’d you get such a short piano player?” The bartender says in response, “There’s a genie in the back of the bar.” The man finishes his beer and runs to the back, looking for the genie. He finds it and says, “I wish for a million bucks.” Suddenly, a million ducks fly out of the bar. The customer looks confused and goes back to the bartender and says, “What just happened?” The bartender replies, “The genie is half deaf, do you really think I’d ask for a 12-inch pianist?”
What is a priest's favorite song?
-- Magic Flute in A minor.
A Mexican was doing a magic trick. He said, "uno, dos," then disappeared without a trace.
what do you call a magician with no magic dyslexic cunt
A blond a bernet and a red head walked into a bar the bartender told them their was a magic merror in the bathroom.He said that if you spoke the truth infront of the merror you would have your greatest desires but if you told a lie you would disappear .The red head sais that she was the pretiest girl in the bar and she walked out the bathroom and she got athusand dollars.The berrnet walked in and said she was the smartest one in the bar she walked out the ber with a new car.The bland went she said I think poof she was gone
a man was forced off the Eiffel Tower, but he flew back up. The executionares asked "how'd you do that?" he said, " I had magic chips, here, take some"they eat them, jump off and die.
He asks for more chips, and the guy says "you're a real a**hole when you're drunk superman."
