What is a cow that does magic?
A smart cow.
Livestock Jokes
Q. What do you call a goose that thinks he's a goat?
A. A Billy Goose.
There were 32 cows. Twenty-eight chickens. How many were there?
There were 32 cows. Twenty ate chickens. How many were there?
What happens when you mess with a farmer? You get the whole ranch.
What do you call a pig?
Pig.
How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
How does a cow introduce his wife?
Meet Patty.
What do you call a cow that's had an abortion?
De-calf-inated.
Mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo - u
What did the cow say to the prostitute?
Moo.
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other?
LEAN BEEF!
What is the worst part of milking a cow?
The smell of the dairy air.
What do you call a pig in a farm?
- A pig in a farm.
I am a sheep.
What do you call a bunch of llamas?
Alpaca llama.
What's a bull's favorite body part?
An eye-BULL!
A lady from the city and her traveling companion were riding the train through Vermont when she noticed some cows. "What a cute bunch of cows!" she remarked.
"Not a bunch, a herd," her friend replied.
"Heard of what?"
"Herd of cows."
"Of course I've heard of cows."
"No, a cow herd."
"What do I care what a cow heard? I have no secrets to keep from a cow!"
What’s a cow’s favorite piece of furniture?
The cowch (couch).
What do you call a cow that has been shot?
Holy cow!
What do cows call money?
Moola.
