A guy and a woman are walking into a forest. The woman says she is lonely. The guy then says, "Don't worry, there will be a third person in a little while."
Little Jokes
One day Little Johnny's class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?" Little Mary says, "The teacher is very intelligent." The teacher asks them, "Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?" Little Suzie says, "They are very fashionable." The teacher says, "Johnny, why don't you have a go? Use the word dictate in a sentence." Johnny thinks for a moment and then says, "Last night I heard Daddy asking Mommy 'Darling how does my dictate'"
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
Why did the little kid cry? His dad forgot to pull out.
Q: What's the best way to eat a squirrel?
A: Open up its little legs.
So, we are in class right, and the teacher has a metal leg. Every year she gets the question of, "Do metal detectors beep every time you walk by them?" She heard this question to the point where she just says yes without hesitation.
Once she had said yes, two kids in the back started laughing.
Teacher: Ok alright, take it a little bit more seriously would you?
Kid: Oh, we're not laughing at that.
Kid_2: We're laughing at cancer.
How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it.
I accidentally drank a little food coloring last night. I ended up dying inside.
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
So we were working with a new client at work, and my boss farts. He said, "A little gas never killed anyone."
Who likes eating ass?
My Little Pony.
How do you kill a little boy?
You throw him between two Catholic priests.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
A little boy went to church. The priest said, "Get in the following positions: stand, then kneel, then bow." The little boy replies, "Can you hurry up and f**k me already?"
I rolled over a log and underneath was a tiny little stick, and I was like, "That log had a child!"
Why was the sea so friendly? Because it gave a little wave.
According to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground, but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don't care about what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black.
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? "You're too young to smoke."
Atoms are untrustworthy little critters. They make everything up!
I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a ladder the other day and I thought, huh, that's a little con-descending.
