Lessing jokes

The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are... Woah!

Who are the fastest readers in the world?

The people in the Twin Towers, because they went through over 100 stories in less than 10 minutes.

More expresso, less depresso. Jk, let's all drink bleach cuz life is a bitch.

When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."

What do you call an orphanage?

A parent-less shelter/homeless shelter.

Child abortion is like tax evasion: the more you lose, the less problems you have.

Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.

It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.

Why did Paul Walker regret turning in his test?

Because his grade went from 99 to 0 in less than a second.

One day I was walking next to a homeless man, and he was eating grass. I asked him if he was hungry. He said yes. I said, "Follow me." You should have seen his face when I showed him my backyard!

What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?

Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.

What do you call an orphan who became a priest?

Father-less.

I wanna tell you guys a joke about a broken pencil...

But it’s quite pointless.

You would think catholic churches would be in favor of condoms: less DNA evidence.

What’s the only victimless crime you can commit? Murder, cause there’s a victim less!

What do you call an orphan that grows up to be a priest?

Father-less.

We should bully foster parents more for raising parent-less nobodies.

Women have less rights than a NASCAR track.

Guys, what do you call an un-aborted and parentless child?...

An orphan.

During Halloween, my friend went as a skeleton.

He refused to go into the haunted house. Looks like he was SPINE-LESS.

A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.

I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.