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Law Enforcement

Law Enforcement jokes

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they all beat the room for being black.

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere!

A policeman once said, "I will never forget 9/11."

I said, "I hope not, that’s your phone number!"

The police: Pull over!

The kid: Do you know who my dad is?

The police: What, your mom did not tell you?

A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."

I saw a man trying to rape a dog. I decided to help. The dog can't stand a chance against the both of us.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they all beat the room for being black.

I called the suicide hotline, and he suggested I draw on myself to distract myself.

I replied I'd get ink poisoning.

Wouldn't recommend, the police came.

I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”

That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.

Shame on you Penaldo!

I don't understand why, when I went to the shooting range today, the police came. Like, bro, I always go to elementary schools.