Laughter jokes
These jokes cheered me up from suicide. This is amazing material. God bless all of you.
Two men are in a rainforest, and one of them is peeing. Suddenly, a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!” He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car, so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened, and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out.” The man went back to the other man and said, “There is no hope, you will die.”
What do you say to your sister when she's crying? -- "Are you having a crisis?"
People keep telling me that I should stop making sh jokes... bro it's not that deep.
"I told my black friend a joke. I told him he needs to lighten up!"
My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, "see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand." He said, "But Dad I'm blind." Exactly.
What did the skeleton say before dinner? "Bone appetit." His whole family found that humerus.
I would roast you, but your mirror does it every time you look into it.
Hey Siri, where is my dad?
Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.
HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen!
Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas.
...WhAT-
Teenager: "OMG, I’m prego, my mom's gonna kill me."
Baby: "Lmao, same"
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He couldn't see that well.
I won't reply to every joke today because I want to say thanks to everyone for making funny jokes here. Every time I have a bad day (almost everyday), I always go here and read relatable jokes. It makes me happy and it's making me less anxious. I am really stressed with my school work and everything; I feel that I'm being left alone. Everyone compares me to others and all I can do is listen. I don't get enough sleep because of it... Reading these jokes entertains me and makes me laugh so hard.
I apologize for my grammar.
Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID.
Son (in a happy tone): I know.
Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad?
Son: Well, yesterday you told me to spread positivity.
What does a cannibal call people in water?
Sea food.
"Hee hee touched me."
Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now.
Mom: Wake up!
Me: No, I'm too disappointed and I have a headache...
Mom: Why are you disappointed?
Me: I took 12 random pills and I still woke up...
Guy: "My life is like a game, I should end it."
Guy 2: "Is it a hard life?"
Guy: "Yup"
Guy 2: "Then you can't kill yourself LOL"
Guy 3: "Hold on, I know a cheat code to finish the 'game'"
Once again, RIP Daniel Kyre, he actually died this day five years ago.
He attempted suicide Sep 16, and was in life support, till his parents made the tough decision of taking him off.
We will miss ya bud..... (cyndagoooooooo)
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A vanilla shake.
Do you want to hear a money joke? "Never mind, it makes no cents."