Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He couldn't see that well.
I would roast you, but your mirror does every time you look into it.
Hey Siri, where is my dad? Your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas. HAH, jokes on you! My dad’s in the kitchen! Your mom’s husband is in the kitchen, your dad is in a strip club in Las Vegas. ...WhAT-
Dad: Son, everyone in your class got COVID. Son (in a happy tone): I know. Dad: How do you know and why are you so glad? Son: Well yesterday you told me to spread positivity.
Sign on my attorney's office wall: "You can't have manslaughter without laughter."
Mom: Wake up!
Me: No, I'm too disappointed and I have a headache...
Mom: Why are you disappointed?
Me: I took 12 random pills and I still woke up...
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A vanilla shake.
Hee hee touched me
Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now
What does an cannibal call people in water
Sea food
My son asked me what dark humor was, so I told him, see that kid in the wheelchair, ask him to stand. He said, But Dad I'm blind. Exactly
what is the one thing cripples can't do......stand up comedy
'i told my black friend a joke'' told him he needs to lighten up!!!
What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory? Two test tickles.
Immigration jokes just cross the line.
i hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though i think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldnt wanna hurt your funny bone, but i think your starting to get BONELY so ill stop pulling your leg. Now get out before i give you a bad time.
I'm funny but sad I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.
What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.
These gags are killing me !
i want to make a joke about kobe but it wont land well
My friends used to poke me at weddings and say "You're next". So I started poking them at funerals and saying "You're next" to my friends.
