Last thing jokes

What was the last thing to run through Osama bin Laden's mind? Probably a bullet.

Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.

The person: "Only the last thing left to hang!"

He grabs a noose.

Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 911 victims?

Well, probably their kneecaps.

The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂

What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?

Two test tickles.

What was the last thing to go through JFK's mind?

A bullet.

What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.

One day in class, little Johnny was mucking around, not listening to the teacher. After 5 minutes, the teacher caught him, finished what she was saying, and said, "Little Johnny, if you weren’t listening, what was the last thing I said?" And little Johnny replied back, "You said, 'What was the last thing I said?'"

What was the last thing to go through the heads of the 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

Mom: Are you seriously gonna die?

Me: No. Don't worry. Suicide is the last thing I'll do.

What’s the only long-lasting thing from China?

Covid.

There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac.

My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.

I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."

What was the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind?

The steering wheel.

Q: What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said to Courtney Love before he died?

A: “Holes gonna be big.”

What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?

Its butt.

There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?

A pentagon!

(9/11 joke)

What is the last thing you wanna see during a prostate exam?

The doctor taking off his watch.

What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits a car's windshield at 100 mph?

Its ass.

Me and my grandpa went on a road trip, and he died. That was the last thing we did together, and I will never forget his last words: “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS!”