40+ Last Thing Jokes

What was the last thing to run through Osama bin Laden's mind? Probably a bullet.

Snow everywhere, it's Christmas time. A person looks at the tree.

The person: "Only the last thing left to hang!"

He grabs a noose.

Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 911 victims?

Well, probably their kneecaps.

The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂

What was the last thing to go through JFK's mind?

A bullet.

The image shows a puppet of Ernie looking angry holding a long thin object. Below him another puppet, Bert, looks terrified. There is text below the puppets: "This is what happens to snitches!" Ernie suddenly shouted. The last thing Bert ever saw was his own blood spraying across the mirror.

What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.

What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?

Two test tickles.

One day in class, little Johnny was mucking around, not listening to the teacher. After 5 minutes, the teacher caught him, finished what she was saying, and said, "Little Johnny, if you weren’t listening, what was the last thing I said?" And little Johnny replied back, "You said, 'What was the last thing I said?'"

Mom: Are you seriously gonna die?

Me: No. Don't worry. Suicide is the last thing I'll do.

What was the last thing to go through the heads of the 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

What’s the only long-lasting thing from China?

Covid.

My mum told me to stop telling the suicidal jokes.

I replied with: "Don't worry, suicide would be the last thing I'd do."

There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac.

What was the last thing that went through Princess Diana's mind?

The steering wheel.

What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield?

Its butt.

There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?

A pentagon!

(9/11 joke)

What is the last thing you wanna see during a prostate exam?

The doctor taking off his watch.

What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits a car's windshield at 100 mph?

Its ass.

Me and my grandpa went on a road trip, and he died. That was the last thing we did together, and I will never forget his last words: “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS!”