Last thing

Last thing jokes

Jumper

What was the last thing that went through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

Lololol get it? They fell from like 100 feet.

Luigi

Q: What was the last thing the United Healthcare CEO heard before he got shot?

A: "It's me, Luigi!"

JFK

You know what would be the best last thing to say before you die? "No, you certainly can't." JFK's assassin certainly can!

Head

What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana’s head before she died?

The steering wheel.

Victim

What's the last thing to go through the minds of 9/11 victims?

Their kneecaps.

Website

I find this website. I see this person named Gwen. I simp for her, but just for a troll. Next thing I know, we're somehow dating? Then her ex comes in and dates her again. Apparently, he is gay, and I'm pretty sure Gwen could be a boy, but he or she has 3 friends who always back her up, just to let y'all know this isn't really supposed to be a dating app or drama app, it's a joke app, and this isn't really a joke. But one last thing, you guys are all b*tches...

Ankle

What was the last thing going through the minds of the people who jumped out of the buildings during 9/11?

Their ankles.

Cock

Jack quietly crawled through Jill’s bedroom window, trying not to make a single noise. She sat on her bed, her back facing him. Jack tiptoed up behind her, laid his hands on her shoulders and said, in a rather sensual tone,

“Boo.”

“Jack!” She yelled, “what are you doing here?”

Jack sat down next to her and smiled.

“I figured today was a good day to maybe go up to the hill?” He said.

“That sounds fun,” said Jill.

“C’mon, let’s go!”

The kids climbed down from Jill’s second story window. They frolicked around in the fields, hair swaying in the wind, as they neared the nearby hill. Jack took Jill’s hand, and they skipped up to the very top of the hill. They sat down on the bright green grass and giggled.

“You ready?” Asked Jack.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Jill replied with a wink.

Jack laid his hand on Jill’s chest, softly pushing her onto her back. He got down on his knees, and bent down to the bottom of her dress.

“I’ve waited a long time for this...” he whispered.

Jack slowly pulled up Jill’s dress with one hand, running the other up her thigh. His anticipation was building faster and faster. He looked her in the eyes as he slowly pulled down her panties. Once they were all the way off, he turned his head downward. His mouth opened, his eyes went wide. Jack was speechless. Before he could say anything, Jill slammed his head down, gagging him with her giant cock. She sat up as she slammed his head up and down. Jack began to feel dizzy as he gagged and coughed.

“Silly Jack, didn’t you know? I’m not Jill. I never was. My name’s Randy. You’re mine now, Jack. So sit back, enjoy the ride.” Said Randy.

Randy moved Jack’s head faster and faster as he threw his head back. It was coming, fast. All of a sudden, he stopped. Jack’s head stood still as his mouth became a fountain of white, drizzling all over Randy’s legs and onto the grass. Randy let go and Jack jumped back, spitting and trying to get it all out of his mouth. Just as the dizziness began to fade, Randy walked over. The last thing Jack saw was Randy’s fist hurtling towards him...

Community

Okay i'm only making this post because I don't want more people hating me. The things that were said in the email to sky were not from me. It was from my friends. The only thing that I said was the apology at the end because I actually am sorry. I loved him and I never wanted to hurt him. I was letting my friends use my computer. But if i'm being completely honest I was planning on breaking up with him only bec… Read more

As a response to what Ihateant... said A lot of what you said is true, I admit that much, I’ve had lots of issue trying to get attention from others, had trouble controlling my temper, and had a god complex, however some of things I said are true, including thinking about unaliving myself in 6th grade, this was because of lots of bullying and just generally struggling with puberty. However, I’ve also been trying to w… Read more

Guys Can I have some advice? I'm having some issues with my dad atm : - my step-mum screamed at me and my brother calling us liars and that we were bitching about them but, we never were - my dad is denying it happened even tho he was there. He's only doing it coz my step-mum is his wife - i get underfed when I visit him There are loads more that I don't remember I can't speak to my mum abt it tho coz she'll tell me to message my dad which is the last thing I want to do or that she'll message my dad which is another one of the last things I want to do