Invite

Invite jokes

Mom

  • Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    You know we straight with doin' your mom

    Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    You know we straight with doin' your mom

    I’m doin' your mom. Yes yours!

    I first saw her in the Wal-Mart pickin' out your drawers.

    Big Dolly Parton hair like an 80s prom queen

    But her ass was lookin' good all up in those mom-jeans.

    I approached her in the checkout line, and said yo baby wassup?

    She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.

    Five minutes later she agreed to get with me

    So we went and rocked the minivan like Giggity. Giggity. Giggity.

    I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart.

    I gave her a lift back to her crib cause her car wouldn’t start.

    She invited me in the house, and we started makin' out again.

    How many times I tap that ass? OVER 9000!

    Yeah. She called me Pledge cause I knocked the dust off it.

    She later made me a sandwich and she cut the crust off it.

    Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young

    To be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.

    Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    Doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    Doin' doin' your mom doin' doin' your mom

    You know we straight with doin' your mom

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  • Movie

  • Your Friend: Bro, I'm having a movie sleepover tonight. I've invited 17 people, wanna come?

    You: Yeah, but why so many people?

    Your Friend: Because the DVD says only 18+ viewers.

    You: Dude!!!!

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  • Date

  • Son: Dad, Dad, OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG!!!!!!!

    Dad: What's wrong? Are you OK?!

    Son: Mia asked me out on a date on February 30th!

    Dad: 'Cause there's no February 30th?

    Shark

  • A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.

    Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."

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  • Missionary

  • A Christian Missionary walks up to some people and says, "Come! Meet Jesus!"

    One of the guys takes out a knife and says, "You first."

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  • Community talk

  • chattings chatersns. ITS A START OF A NEW FUCKING ERA. INVITE FRIENDS HERE, WE GOTTA REVIVE TS