What do pedophiles and Sandy Hook have in common?
Shooting up schoolchildren.
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
We're all unique, which is something we all have in common.
Girl: "Come over."
Orphan: "I can't."
Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"
Orphan: "Oh cool, something we have in common."
You know what me and my spine both have in common? We are both not straight.
What do tampons and your sister have in common?
My new stepfather told me that I'm his new son, so I said okay.
My stepfather said that my and your mom have a few things in common. I said, "Yeah, like what?" My stepfather said, "Well, you came out of your mother's pussy; I eat your mother's pussy. You used to suck on your mother's tits; now I suck on your mother's tits. Your mother used to smack you in the ass when you act up; now I smack your mom in the ass now. Your mother calls me daddy; now I am your new daddy."
What do TVs and girls have in common?
They both show you stuff when you turn them on!
What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don't care if she has one.
What has a kid with cancer and Peter Pan in common?
They will never grow up.
What do orphans, parents, and a ball have in common?
If you throw them, they both will never come back.
What do Will from "Stranger Things" and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air have in common? They're both named Will, and their lives both got flipped, turned upside down.
What do your teacher and your friend have in common?
They will both die eventually.
What do a moose and a triceratops have in common?
Both have noses.
What do a friend and a mouse have in common? They will both be angry if you throw bricks at them.
What does your mum and Istanbul have in common?
They are all insane comebacks!!!
What does this joke and half a deck of cards have in common?
You can't even deal with it!
Q: What do women and KFC have in common?
A: Once you eat the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.
What does Bill Cosby and someone eating at McDonald's have in common?
There both mc lovin what there eating.
