Home jokes

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because he can't find home.

Hairline is so far up, Patrick Mahomes can't even sell to a wide receiver.

Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.

Get the whip, you're out!

I wondered why there was red all over my bathroom til I found out that my sis had dyed her hair red. Man, it looked like somebody died in there! Lol.

The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"

I left my Avatar at home today.

The adoption center threw a party. Why? 'Cause the parents weren't home.

If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?

Hey Evan, this is Dad. Ya, I’m still not home.

Don't you hate when you have sex with your teacher, then remember you're home schooled?

How can you make a orphans hand bleed?

Real them to clap until there parent come home.

Why can't weapons play baseball?

Because they need to get to home base.

Me: What do you call an orphan?

Friend: Homeless.

"Aren't you going back home now?"

"No, I am going back home."

Is your home the Twin Towers? Because I'm tryna crash!

What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.

The umpire and the catcher were having a conversation. The runner slid into home, “I slid into this conversation.”

Why do orphans hate plane rides?

Because there’s no home to come back to.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

They can't run home.