Home jokes
"Aren't you going back home now?"
"No, I am going back home."
Why don't orphans need parent approval for their wedding?
Because they never came home.
When do you know your dad knows you are sneaking out? He hears the loud creaks.
What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they won't know where home plate is.
Why do most orphans cook for themselves?
They don't have a home cook.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home plate.
I went to a store to get milk, but when I got home, there were a million cows waiting for milk, so they killed me.
The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.
The umpire and the catcher were having a conversation. The runner slid into home, “I slid into this conversation.”
Why can't an orphan play baseball? They can't find home plate.
Why was the orphan so famous?
Because when they asked him go big or go home, he only had one option.
I saw my midget neighbor at a bus stop.
"Jump in, I'll give you a lift home," I said.
"Bugger off!" he shouted back.
"What an ungrateful little man," I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
Three men were lost in the desert and found a genie who granted each of them a wish.
The 1st man wished he was home with his family. The 2nd man wished he was home with his family, and the 3rd man wished they were all back together again.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
Alright class, the person who answers my next question gets to go home.
Then a guy throws a pencil. The teacher asks, "Who threw that pencil?" "I did, I get to go home."
What does a skeleton tile his roof with?
Tiles.
WTF did you think he’d tile it with?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't have a home base.