What's the difference between E.T. and an orphan?
E.T. can phone home.
Home Jokes
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"
The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"
Why can't orphans use a phone?
Because they don't have a home screen.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because he can't get home.
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
"No Way Home" is just the life of an orphan.
The mailman came to drop the mail off.
Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.
Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."
Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."
I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"
My wife complained about me being childish. So I told her to get out of my fort.
Why do Orphans like school?
Because they don't have a home to go back to afterwards.
New Gen iPhones are designed for orphans, because they don’t need a home button.
What did the creep do when the woman said, “Make yourself at home?”
He hid in her attic.
I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.
My family was watching Home Alone 2, so whenever Kevin was at the top of the Twin Towers, I threw a paper airplane at the T.V.
Apple created the iPhone X for orphans because they don't have a home.
Orphans are pretty tough. I mean, you never see them running home...
I was an orphan as a kid, but I have never had a bitch, so I asked this cheerleader to homecoming, and she said, "Mofo, you are only coming to hoco because you need a home to go to!"
An orphan once said, "I will call my mum and go home."
A homeless kid once said he will go home.
Why couldn’t the orphan run away from home?
Because it didn’t have one.
