Home jokes
A bicurious man goes to a gay bar.
A gay man offers him a drink.
The bi man explains he doesn't know if he's gay or not.
"That's fine," he says, "let's just have a drink."
The gay man asks him for a dance, and he explains again he isn't sure if he's gay or not.
Eventually, the gay man invites him to go home with him to hang out as friends.
They get to his house, and the gay man says, "Do you fancy having sex?"
He isn't sure, so the gay man explains, "I'll push in slow, and at any point you want to stop, make animal sounds, and if you like it, start singing."
So they get to it, and the gay man pushes in slowly, the bi man bursts out "MOOOOO MOOOOO MOOOOOOVVVEE CCLOSSEEERRRR"
You could think that some orphans are gay.
But think, would they be home-osexual? 🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home plate.
What's the difference between an orphan and a baseball player?
The baseball player knows where home base is.
A few kids were talking about how big their houses were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. One little boy said, "Bet I have the biggest home." To everyone's surprise, he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.
Well, I got stuck in the dryer and fell asleep. Then my step bro got home, and I did not know, and hours later I woke up. My pants were down, and my butt was on fire.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? Because there is no home plate.
How do you close a cabinet?
You closet! Hahahhyaahhahaaahhahaha!
Why do orphans get iPhones 11?
Because it has no home page.
Knock knock. Who's there? Parents. Parents who? That's what an orphan would say.
So I went to my friend's house and he told me to make myself at home, so I kicked him out. I don't like visitors.
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
"Go big or go home," that's what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that's what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that's what I say.
I know an orphan named Zara, and he has never had homemade food.
In India, whoever lives facing the roadside, this is for them.
Whenever it starts raining heavily, our homes turn into pool-facing homes because the roads disappear.
Timmy: *grabs box of Trojans*
Daddy:...
Timmy: Well come on diddy!
Daddy: Well shit lets go son!
Both: YEE YEE
SWEET HOME ALABAMA
Stranger: Tries to kidnap a kid.
Kid: Runs home.
A few minutes later, the kid was in the back of the van...
If you know, you know.
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
Q. When is your grandfather's bedtime?
A. Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
What do you call an orphan?
Homeless.