Home jokes
What is the difference between a tree house for dinner, and dinner with you today after school?
What is the difference between a human and a magic house to get to a tree and a house to get to the earth to get home š”? Day today I have to get my kids and oooooo.
Good day today, love you. Walk in love day and a walk home night. Night, night. I did not get snow. I love it is the day that we get a tree. I have to go get some sleep. Was good day at school today, but Iām going to be...
I did a good job and walk walk home and walk walk to the car and drive. What is the difference between a good [what]?
I did a walk, walk, and I had to a car and a walk home from home I did.
Hi, I love you. You know I do. What a good night of a good time and time to go, oooo!
What time is it when you can drive home from phone?
I'm so poor that when people come over to my house, I come out the window and say, "Ding Dong!"
Why canāt orphans say "Iām in the ghetto?" Because they canāt say "Iām in a home."
What do you call an orphan with parents?
Idk, I never met one before.
Bonus joke: I went up to an orphan and asked where his parents were. He said, "I donāt have any." I said, "Wonder why."
Another bonus joke: Me: Hey. Orphan: Hey. Me: What do you do for fun? Orphan: Look for my parents. Me: Me, so they're not dead? Orphan: No, they just abandoned me.
More bonus: What do you call a homeless kid?
An orphan.
Last bonus: Why donāt orphanages teach kids about home?
Because they canāt find one.
lmao this is so funny, dark humor can be funny. Sorry, orphans!
What time is it when you can drive a house? Time to get a wheelchair.
I did a walk through and walk home from school, and I got home.
What time is it when you walk home from school? Time to rest.
Why donāt orphans play football?
They have no home field.
There was a man. He came home with his friends from the bar and man was he ever wasted! Their friends made sure to get him home safely. The next morning, he woke up and found blood all over his nightstand. He called his friends and asked for his alarm clock back.
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did the splits and suctioned cupped herself to the floor.
She yelled out for her husband, "Bruce! Bruce!" and he came running in. "Bruce, Iāve bloody suctioned myself to the floor!" she said.
"Sātruth, Sheila!" Bruce said, and tried to pull her up. "Youāre stuck fast girl. Iāll go across the road and get me mate Cobber."
They came back and they both tried to pull her up from the floor. "No way, we canāt do it!" Cobber said, "So letās try Plan B."
"Plan B?" exclaimed Bruce, "Whatās that?"
"Iāll go home and get me hammer and chisel and weāll break the tiles under her," replied Cobber.
"Spot on!" Bruce said, "While youāre doing that, Iāll stay here and play with her nipples."
"Play with her nipples?" Cobber said, "Not exactly a good time for that mate!"
"No... " Bruce replied, "But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are a lot cheaper."
What makes it cold in a room? Air conditioning.
What time is it when your kids stay home from school? S'no time!
I gave an orphan an iPhone X for a reason.
It doesnāt have a home button.