Home jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
When the washer started running, why did you join me?
Because I had to catch it.
Why can’t orphans build computers?
They don’t know where to put the motherboard.
So, one day I was walking home from school with my best friend, Sally. She was worried to get home because she was going to tell her mom that Bob, the class rep, got her pregnant eight months ago, and now it was obvious she was pregnant. So I said, “Sally, it’ll be okay, I’m sure she’ll be happy to get a grandson.” “Yeah, thanks, Suzy,” she said to me, then went into her house.
The next few weeks she didn’t show up to school, so I was like, oh, she must be in trouble with her mom. I’ll go check on her.
So I walk up to her house and her mom answers with a baby boy in her hands. “Oh, hello. Is that Sally’s son?!! Can I see Sally?” Her mom says sure, and I go inside, but she leads me to the backyard and I see a tombstone. “Here lies Sally 2004-2020.” So I ask her mom in tears, “Oh, did she not make it through the birth?” And her mom replied, “You could say that...”
What movie do orphans hate most?
"Home Alone."
What's your favorite place that orphans can't go to?
Home.
Person: Where's your mom and dad?
Orphan: :(
If an orphan were to get a takeaway, what’s the home address?
You can't give an orphan homework.
Why do orphans have to be homeschooled?
Because they can't be home schooled.
Why can’t an orphan hit a home run? Because he doesn’t have a home.
Why can't an orphan hit a home run? Because they don't know where home is.
Why are orphanages like dogs?
Because they get adopted.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? Home Alone.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
I did a good job of being home from school.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home, there were signs everywhere.
One day I was walking around, then saw this mom mad at her kid and screamed, "You're adopted!" He said, "Yeah, I know. My REAL mommy is still at home with daddy."
What is the difference between snow boots and snow boots and walk home?