HI Jokes

My friend said that his book was getting boring and that he's gonna kill off some characters.

I asked him what his book was about and he said, "Oh, it's an autobiography."

One day I was saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, “Yeah, what gave me away?” I said, “His parents.”

To Tina: Hi, love, you're my oldest and dearest friend. I will love you for as long as I live. I luvv you so much, my sweetest, dearest darling.

Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!

How does Moses brew his coffee?

He brews it.

Lmao

The image shows a man with grey hair looking confused with his hands on his head. Above him, text reads, "50 Cent when he travels to Vietnam and has to change his name to 11,706 Dong."

Hi Blake.

Give a man a potato, he is full for a day.

Give a man a poisoned potato, he'll be full for the rest of his life.

Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.

Hi my sweet friends! This is for everyone who needs help right now :)

Where did the king put his armies?

In his sleevies.

A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.

"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"

Little Mickel was on a tree.

He fell down and hurt his knee.

He sat down and started to cry, and from there, he would never lie.

What does the drummer call his twins? Anna 1, Anna 2.

Ahaha, I'm laughing because my friend is so black his mama killed the clown.

If you give Kobe Bryant a cigarette, he will be warm for a short time.

But he was set on fire in the helicopter crash, so now he's warm for the rest of his life.

Did you hear the one about the Polish elevator operator?

He was fired from his job because he couldn’t learn the route.

Question: Why does my teenage brother wear a cape to bed?

Answer: Because he can't sleep in his race car bed...

I can't believe what just happened. I was at the bowling alley having a great time with my girlfriend when suddenly a man took all of our bowling pins! I asked him why and he said he needed more tapins to keep his career relevant. I instantly realized it was Penaldo!