Herring jokes

Was busy robbing a house as quietly as possible and saw a woman catching me in the act, decided to get her in on the act and gave away my location from the noise.

Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her tit, I got a mouthful of knee.

Your mom is just like Rapunzel, but instead of letting down her hair, she lets everyone down! OHHHHH!

I used to be a fan, but after seeing her OnlyFans account, I'm a whole air conditioner.

Yo mama is so ugly, when I took a picture of her, my phone screen cracked.

Your mom is so ugly that even Medusa turned to stone from looking at her!

A man sees a girl crying and asks her what's wrong.

The girl replied, "Everyone keeps making fun of me."

"You should tell your parents," I replied back.

The girl started crying even more. That's when I got confused and left the orphanage.

Yo mamma so dumb, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.

I scanned an emo girl's arm the other day. Now I own her, only 3.99 with tax. That's a steal and a half, woopeeee!

Your dad left you because he went for milk.

*1,000,000 years later*

Her: Dad come back!

Him: FBI open up!

One day, someone's ex was going to the kitchen to get something to eat, and her ex-boyfriend was there and gave her an apple. Next minute, she had chlamydia. What did the boyfriend do?

Your mom is so fat nobody can compare her to anything.

Yo mama so ugly, her birth certificate was an apology.

Mom said drugs are my enemies. God said love your enemies. What do I tell her?

"My sister said she was the only smart one in the class."

"What about the teacher you learn *from*?"

She really sucks, and the guy who is with her sucks too.

Comment anything if you like what you saw with Gwen in her bra!

My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.

Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.

If I worked for Edexcel, I'd give Caroline Flack an A* for her physics experiment.