Gravity jokes
How do fat people settle arguments?
By bumping into each other to see who falls over first.
Why is the fat man roping himself to the side of a mountain?
So he doesn't roll back down!
How do you make a baby survive a fall of over 300 metres?
I don't know. I've dropped dozens off the Empire State Building and none have lived.
Your mama is so fat that when she jumped, they found water on Mars.
Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.
Leave a man on a plane, and he flies for a day.
Throw a man off a plane, and he flies for the rest of his life.
A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building.
He yells, "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”
What does a physicist call it when a suicidal person is high up? Potential energy.
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
Did you know there are black holes billions of years old?
What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied. We're only 14 years old.
My friend said she wanted to fly, so I pushed her off a building.
What’s the opposite of Stephen Hawking? Stephen walking.
Why did the parachute refuse to open?
Because it had a "fatal attraction" to the ground.
An Emo kid in a tree falls. At the same time an apple falls from the same tree, what hits the ground first? The apple would be due to the kid's rope and noose.
I’d tell BlessedBrian to aim for the stars, but it seems like his GRAVITATIONAL PULL is holding him back.
A kid and an apple fall from a tree, who will reach the ground first?
The apple, because the kid is hanging on the tree with a rope.
What kind of candy do astronauts eat in space?
Mars bars.
Yo mama is so fat, she jumped into the air and got stuck!
Yo mama so fat, when she sits down she dislocates Earth out of its orbit.