Good Will jokes

Why would an orphan be a good Spider-Man?

Because his parents will be far from home.

Why are Indians so good at football?

Each time they get a corner, they open a shop.

Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when I push my autistic brother down the stairs.

Me: Good night, everyone.

My friends and family: Night.

Me: *gets in coffin*

My family: *stares at my friends* You aren't going to do something?!?

My friends: *to my family* Nope, this is normal.

Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, like when you push them down the stairs.

Can anyone answer this riddle? Apparently this is the world's hardest riddle! Good luck 😝

“I turn polar bears white, and I will make you cry. I make guys have to pee, and girls comb their hair. I make celebrities look stupid, and normal people look like celebrities.”

The Good Old Days.

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

You look nice, and you seem like good fun, so if I give you this flower, will you finger my bum?

I know the voices in my head aren't real, but man, do they have some good ideas.

I don't struggle with depression- like, at this point, I have it down. I'm good at depression.

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One's a good year, and one's a great year.

I had a good time with friends!

My grief counselor died just the other day.

He was so good though, I didn't care.

What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?

“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”

Trying to find a good parking spot is a lot like trying to find a girlfriend.

If you can’t find one, you stick it in the disabled spot and hope nobody finds out.

Teacher: Okay class, what's a word that begins with A?

Student: Apple!

Teacher: Good! What's a word beginning with B?

Student:....Bitch...

Why are orphans good at being a criminal?

Because they're not wanted.

The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.

I was crying because my dad was cutting onions...

Onions was a good dog.

Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.