Go jokes

Joker gives Batman a phone.

Thomas: "Uhh, son, we need to talk... about the uhh, dressing up."

Martha: "Hello dearie, Brucie, is it ok if you visit me when you go to Joker's house?"

So, some ants in a colony go to war. They want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants.

They start barging into homes to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home, and the lady-ant goes, "Hey, why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants replies with, "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house."

Why didn't R. Kelly go to Germany to fuck teens? The legal age there is 14...Like bro hop on a plane and fuck a 14 year old hooker!

What do black men in the NBA like about going to the locker room after they are done playing basketball?

Receiving golden showers from other black teammates.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Because he was sans and too lazy to get his butt off the couch.

Some bread teacher: What will Reddit be in a few years?

Dumb Kid: DEADit?

Bread Teacher: You get an FY for FUCK YOU!

Bread Teacher: It will be BREADit!

Student: Hah, that's VERY funny! Might as well go to DEADit so I can die of laughter.

Today, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the residents if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

My parents are the worst.

I saw an emo orphan by a tree, and I was going to give it a high-five, but instead I just let it hang.

Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.

There were three guys stranded on a desert island. Each was granted one wish by a genie that found them. The first guy said, "I wish to go back home." The second guy says the same, and the third guy said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were back here."

1) What was Techno's reaction when he died?

2) Where did all the orphans go?

PS: In case you don't get it, it's a pedophile joke, cuz he is one!

Damn, the guy who made the "Whip/Nae Nae" song really made his cousin go Silento.

I ran into a fat woman today. She said next time, don't hit me. I said I don't think I have enough gas to go around.

Then the ground started to rumble with every step she took.

Why did the farmer go to the strip club?

Because he was looking for his hoe.

Go to the replies, look at the top and it will say "in your mum."

Why did the rapist go after the mute? It would be a silent attack.

I was going to kill myself, but in the end, it doesn't even matter.

At least Stephen Hawking could go on a pub crawl.

Next time you see a Brit, go up to them and say:

"Imagine losing a 'Tea Party in Boston.'"

Waiter: "Here you go, one medium-rare steak."

Me: "I like it well done."

Waiter: "Thanks, that means a lot!"