As a son, I set up a home date with my mom and my friend because I was going out of town. I set it up by telling my friend that my mom thinks he is cute, and I told my mom that my friend thinks that she is hot.
I came home the next day. I see in the living room my friend giving it to my mom doggy style. I ask what's going on. My mom said to me, "Meet your new daddy," then my friend said, "Hey son, get me a beer from the fridge."
Why can’t orphans get married?
Because they were already given away.
How did the orphan lose its parents?
It’s parents never came back from getting milk.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for his birthday? Because the iPhone X doesn't have a home button
I bet emos get jealous when their phone dies.
Q: What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
A: A red-headed bitch with a yeast infection.
Q: What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A: A piece of ass that brings tears to your eyes.
Q: What do you get when you cross Viagra and Donald Trump?
A: Erection fraud. (Just a joke.)
How do you get Carrie Underwood to dehydrate fast?
Tell her that all the water supplies contain the COVID vaccine.
How do you get Wacko Jacko to screw a lightbulb?
Tell Jacko that the bulb is a 6-year-old boy.
Yo mama so fat, she had to have 5 doorways to get anywhere!
What’s the difference from Cotten and an orphan
One gets picked
Are you a border cause I can't get over you.
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
Why do men get great ideas in bed?
'Cause they are plugged into a genius!
What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without kids.
What happens to teeth when they go in water?
Bro, I dunno, they get wet?
Pickup line for gay people:
Roses are red Antarctica is in the south Get on your knees And open your mouth
Imagine the only way you can get laid is if you force it. 😂 Loser!
Why can orphans travel around so much?
A. They never get homesick.
