Get laid

Get Laid Jokes

Egg

What's the difference between eggs and you? Eggs get laid, you don't.

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  • Pedophile

    A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."

  • 2
  • Sexual Assault

    A guy walks into a bar. He sees a hot girl. He walks up to her and says, "You're getting laid tonight." She replies, "What are you, some sort of psychic?" He says, "No, I'm just stronger than you."

    Redhead

    WARNING OFFENSIVE: What is the difference between a redhead and a brick? ... A brick gets laid.

  • 7
  • Egg

    Q: What's the difference between an egg and me?

    A: An egg gets laid.

    Common

    What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common They both get laid by Mexicans

    Rape

    Men should provide their disobedient daughters with their own "milk" instead of letting them use the mother. That will teach those bitches some respect for men. It may even help them get laid later on in life.

    Bridge

    What does a bridge and a fat chick have in common?

    They’ll eventually get laid by a Mexican.

    Eye

    An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind...

    ...but it will allow ugly people to get laid.

    Mama

    Yo mama is like train tracks; she gets laid all around the country.

    Ranga

    What's the difference between a Ranga and a Brick?

    A Brick can get laid.

    Health

    Sometimes I look at someone I hate and think, "I hope you get laid tonight."

    By a tweaker with AIDS.

    Brick

    Why is a brick always hard? Because he seen the brick that was getting laid right next to him.

    Sex

    Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?

    "I'm stronger than you."

    Loser

    Imagine the only way you can get laid is if you force it. 😂 Loser!