This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Want to know how to fit 71 people in the car? 2 in the front while we handle 69 in the back.
What is 80 feet wide and has 22 teeth?
Answer; The front row of a Trump Rally!
A robber breaks into a house while the residents are away one dark night. Eager to see what he can loot, he quickly starts searching through cupboards and dressers, grabbing valuables with a trained eye. Suddenly, he hears a voice come out of nowhere. "Jesus is watching you." The criminal jumps, scared the residents are back, and freezes. After a few minutes of silence however, he assumes it was his imagination, and goes back to robbing. A couple minutes pass, before once again, the voice returns. "Jesus is watching you." Quite confused, the thief searches the house and checks the front door, but nothing pops out as unusual. He finally decides to move rooms, and finds a parrot, but ignores it. Before he can begin to do anything, someone speaks again, "Jesus is watching you." The robber realized it was the parrot talking! Going to the parrot, he asks it, "Are you the one who's been talking to me?" The parrot responds, "Yes." The thief couldn't believe it. So, he asks another question. "What is your name?" "Ismael." the parrot replies. The man scoffed. "What type of idiot names a parrot Ismael?" The parrot speaks yet again, "The same type of idiot that names a Rottweiler Jesus."
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
So there's a little girl playing hopscotch at the front of her house while her mother hangs up the washing and her father mows the lawn. She says "Step on a crack and you break your mother's back,". The father laughs, until his daughter steps on a crack resulting in her mother's back breaking. The little girl's father looks in terror, she then says "step on a line and you break your father's spine,". The father closes his eyes waiting for his spine to break, but nothing happens. When he opens his eyes again he sees that he is ok, and nothing has happened to him. Suddenly he hears someone yell out "OW MY SPINE,". The father runs around the corner to see the mailman laying on the floor.
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? to get to the other side
I will remember my biker buddies last words ̈Why did you cut in front of me ̈.
Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 9/11 victims?
Well, probably the person in front of them.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Why do we never make adult jokes in front of orphan Because the joke needs parental guidance
A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says “well all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket”. So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says “dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
What do a girl and a bar have in common?
A- Liquor in the front poker in the back!!
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car
A: A suicide bomber
Three nuns are having a charity in front of the church. A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes the three nuns. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke but the third nun, her arm was too short.
