Fitness jokes
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.
Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.
I asked the gym trainer what type of machine I should use to get the best looking women.
He said the ATM outside.
"I'm sorry," the doctor says, "you have a rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you, and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."
"Will that cure me?" the patient asks.
"Well, no," the doctor replies, "but it's the only food that will fit under the door."
I tried to make vegetable soup today, but the wheelchair didn't fit in the pot.
Most people my age have had sex. Not my fault I'm not able to fit in.
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
I got some new jeans yesterday, until I realized they didn't fit me around the waist, so I went looking for a belt. I couldn't find one. Then I had a really good idea. I could attach a ton of watches together to make a belt! But then I just thought it was a waste of time.
The average stripper weighs 112 lbs.
According to the pole 💈.
Me: What are we doing in HPE?
Friend: Fitness.
Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.
Jo mama is so fat that I could write 3 paragraphs, and she still wouldn't fit!
What is white, black, and red and can't fit through a revolving door?
A nun with a spear through her head!
Yo mama is so fat that when she walks, she causes earthquakes. She is so big that she has her own zip code and gravity field. She is so heavy that she needs a crane to get out of bed. She is so obese that she can't fit in any clothes, except for a circus tent. She is so large that she blocks the sun and causes eclipses.
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
Willis.
Willis who?
Willis dick fit in yo mouth?!
What’s a rapper’s favorite exercise?
Heavy bars.
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
Have you heard of dideys?
Dideys balls fit in your mouth.
What was the one test Stephen Hawking couldn't pass? The beep test.